Strategies To Curb Selfishness

Strategies To Curb Selfishness
The first most important thing is that parents need to know that there's no gene for "spoiled". So along the way, our kids do come hard-wired for the capacity to feel for others, as long as we nurture it, and I think that's the gift you're really trying to instill in your child.

The first step, which may be the hardest one, is to try to fight the tendency to over-indulge your child. I know we want the best for them, but we need to realize that if we always give into every whim, we not only create a selfish kid, but we have a child who is never satisfied with who they are; it's always what they have that matters most. So start setting some limits and be able to say "no".
Secondly, you may also want to give an allowance. An allowance means that there are no loans; there is no "in advance". You spend what you have, but then that's it. This will help the child not only manage money, but realize that parents are not always going to give in. The real world is being able to have a balance with it. Most importantly, we need to re-enforce generosity.

When we see our children being generous or when we see them sharing, recognize and acknowledge it. When children realize the impact of their generosity, they're more likely to do it. And always use the "how would you feel" question. Our children are born with this miraculous capacity to feel for others, but unless we nurture it and stretch it, it's going to lie dormant.

And finally, expect gratitude in your house. Expect your child to say thank-you and to write thank-you notes.