Good Sibling Relationships

Good Sibling Relationships

When my oldest daughters were very small, I tried to find ways to ensure that they remembered how much they loved each other, even when they weren't getting along very well. At dinnertime, about once a week, we would have what we called "A Love Feast" and each member of the family would go around the table and say something that they loved about each other family member. 

My two youngest children were very small at this time, but it was humorous and it lightened whatever conflict was going on between them at the time and it just seemed to help all of us to keep in focus and remember that even if we weren't getting along, we loved each other. I think it put them in touch with feelings that they might not have been in touch with otherwise. They would come up with things that surprised themselves sometimes. When 5 people that are the closest to you all say something nice about you at one time, it's a wonderful feeling. It made me feel blessed every time. 

Another idea is called the "honey-dear rule". Whenever two of them were fighting (usually my 2 younger children who are of different genders) and I felt it was getting out of hand, I would step in and say, "Okay, it's time for the honey-dear rule". They could address each other and continue on in whatever dialogue they were having, but they had to address each other with either "honey" or "dear", which caused a good bit of humor at the time. It's hard to stay mad when you're addressing someone as "honey" or "dear."