Helping Toddler Adjust to New Baby

Here are some ideas to help parents spend time with their new baby without feeling like they are neglecting the older child:

When my baby was born, I felt like I was always telling my older son to "wait a minute" while I was attending to the baby, and I felt bad about that and tried to think of some good things to say that would help my older son understand what was going on.

One thing I would do when the baby first woke up from his nap and was crying, but I knew he was okay, I would call upstairs to him and say, "Wait a minute, I'm with your older brother right now". My older son really appreciated that every once and awhile I would tell the baby to wait.

I also tried to be very specific about when I would be able to do something with him. For example, I would say "as soon as your video is over" or "as soon as I finish burping the baby," then we'll do whatever it was we had planned. I still use these techniques even now that my children are grown because there are still times when one child is getting more attention than another.

I always try to do or say something specific so that the other child realizes that I haven't forgotten them, and sometimes that acknowledgement that mommy is paying attention to them as well, is all that kids really need.